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  • Terriann Muller

Christmas 2020, In Spite of it all... Don't be a Scrooge



Seriously, 2020 has been quite the year! So much that has changed world wide. Everyone I know, knows someone that has, or has had COVID, but the truth is, in spite of the uncertainty of these times, there are things WE CAN DO to help! #DOYOURPART


This does NOT mean it is okay or even good to be a Scrooge!!


Ways to STOP SCROOGING:


Here is a Super EASY SUPER GREAT Tips list:

  1. Be Happy even though...."fill in the blank here", you have it in you, I promise, (it's part of being a Renegade Widow!

  2. Keep your hands sanitized to minimize risk

  3. Social distance, but not too distant , to where you are not being kind

  4. Lean into your faith!! Having faith in something bigger than ourselves and our own ability is HUGE in you having MORE HOPE and BEING HAPPY

  5. Be thankful for your blessings, count them one-by-one, create a blessings journal and jot them down daily

  6. Continue to build your hope muscle, go back to #4, faith brings hope

  7. Think of a kind gesture you can do to brighten someones day, every single day, then do it

Stay with me here... less than 4 minutes, of reading left .... 🤷🏻‍♀️


How easy is it to offer a kind word or gesture? Even offering a kind smile is super powerful for both the giver and the receiver! (I find myself smiling bigger, than ever, during this pandemic, so that my smile can be seen in my eyes, (yep, the mask is making me smile bigger!)


Have you ever noticed how good you feel when you act out a kind gesture? The best way I know how to get out of a funk is to take my eyes completely off of myself and first turn to God, then turn to helping someone else. Do this often, it does not have to be huge, a small kind gesture goes a long way!


And, oh yes, I know what it feels like to have zero inclination, to even fathom helping someone else when my whole world is in shambles…. I really do and more than once. I know that feeling. 


More so lately I hear my clients saying, "I keep waking up cranky."


"I want to bury my head in my pillow and binge watch Netflix."


"I don’t want to face the day."


You might be thinking, “ya, so what I feel like that every day, the world is a disaster”


What I would say to that, welcome to the club, giving you a high five,…. Kidding!!! What I really would say is STOP IT!! 


Anyway, some of you know and some don’t know, I currently have a very real, very difficult situation in my family. It is not a brand-new situation but for whatever reason I kept waking up tired and cranky, which reminded me of my early widowhood days. *Sigh*

 

Since that is 100% not who I am, totally not my normal! What I did, with intention, was to go back to a familiar standby....


Look for opportunities to volunteer, to give a little more in the offering plate for families in need, to give a little more to the Salvation Army Bell Ringers donation tub, or to help someone in need of encouragement.


I have to get in motion, helping someone else, and let God do the heavy lifting on the

things I have no control over. 


You can get into motion in a way that energizes you and helps your heart to feel happy!!


So often in widowhood, we become laser focused on ourselves, obsessed in our sorrow, loneliness, pain, hopelessness, to the point we totally blow past someone else in need of even the smallest of things.  


You might be thinking, "I don't have anything to give, I am tired and depleted."


But you do, and I PROMISE, you will feel better if you offer a kind word or gesture. Studies suggest that when we focus on giving to or helping others, it makes us happy, even happier than spending money on ourselves.


Adding to that, our kindness might create a virtuous cycle that promotes lasting happiness and altruism, not to mention a ripple effect that can transcend the world.


So often, widowhood or not, we forget what's important, let’s call it “first world problems.”

  • My cell phone won’t hold a charge

  • My designer dog chewed up a $40 pillow from World Market

  • I don’t feel like going out to the grocery store to buy….anything I freaking want

  • I lost my $25 mascara

You get the idea! 


Today, I am CHALLENGING YOU to get out of the house with the sole intention of spreading good cheer!

  • Start committing random acts of kindness.

  • Volunteer, for a day or weekly reoccurring, do what fits with your schedule, but stretch yourself a bit

  • Spend just 45 - 60 minutes going through your own winter warm clothes and bedding, things you haven’t worn or used in 5 years, and haul them straight to the homeless shelter near you… don’t know how to find it, google “homeless shelter near me” and watch what happens.

  • Gather up a box of canned goods and look for the local fire department that is surely collecting food for the less fortunate (make sure they are NOT expired) 

As we approach the holidays, let’s get our hearts right and our eyes shifting on ways we can be a difference maker!  It is YOU THAT WILL BENEFIT!


TOGETHER AS RENEGADE WIDOWS, Let’s learn to really focus on our blessings:


Things like, running water, abundantly available food sources, heat, carpet on our floors, a freezer with tons of fresh meat and ice cream in it, an indoor toilet that flushes, clothes in our closets that we will never wear again but there they are.

Giggle (not sure why I giggled there, but I did!)


You know what I’m saying, though, right? 


If this doesn’t make you feel better, I will eat my hat. Well I don’t have a hat on but if I did, I would! 


To-Do List: 

  1. Get off your anatomy and do something altruistic ASAP!

  2. Write a list of 29 things you are grateful for.... I want to hear from you!!

  3. Post YOUR LIST in our closed Facebook Group!

  4. Think of 5 kind things you can do NOW, take action and report back!


Let's hear it, what did you do, how did it make you feel, what are you grateful for??


I. DARE. YOU.


Love and light,

Terriann


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